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With days to go before Christmas, my boys have finished school, all the presents are wrapped and stored at a safe location (away from prying eyes) and the dreaded food shop has been tackled.

I’ve checked my bank balance daily to ensure that I’m within budget.

Together with my husband, we have tried to create another near-perfect Christmas for all the boys.

I phoned the CSA today to see if there has been any progress on my case with my ex. I do so roughly every four weeks. If you’re unlucky enough to need a third party involved when you split, you’ll know that you need to maintain regular contact with the Agency to ensure your case remains active!

Again, there is no new information. We are still locked in with no information.

Unsurprisingly, he isn’t receiving wages.

Surprisingly, he isn’t in receipt of benefits.

Most surprisingly, he isn’t in prison!

The details to date: he last had contact in June 2008, he then moved away without a forwarding address, his parents ceased contact with my boys in 2011, the deduction of earnings order against him failed in August 2013 as he came off benefits.

He is a man in his 40s with no income. Although he does have a fixed address and he’s applying for credit from a different address…

As a parent, I want to ensure my boys have the very best that I can offer them. I know that my husband feel exactly the same way – and as time goes on, the children have come to realise that the best their birth father can do is stay out of their lives and allow them to be brought up by a man with good morals and a grounded knowledge of what being a fantastic parent is, thanks to my wonderful mother-in-law!